Why Self-Care Is Necessary Not Selfish by Suzie Bateman

Now at 41 years old (its taken me a while!) I can now recognise the signs and I try to put extra things in place at this point to try and help myself and catch it early. In all honesty though, this is a work in progress for me. It does not come naturally to me to slow down and put myself first at all. I am sure that many of you reading this will agree its not always easy to do. I have come to recognise that self care isn’t selfish, that it is in fact necessary to support our own health and wellbeing. There is always a job to do, someone to see, chores to be done, play dates to be arranged and a fridge to be filled. Over the years I think I have been guilty of filling my ‘spare’ time with so many things that I had forgotten what it was like to simply do nothing and to be comfortable with actually taking the time to rest and recharge. This is something that I try to prioritise and give myself permission to do.

The fact of the matter is that I actually like to be busy, I love people, I love my job (to me it doesn’t feel like work), I love my family, my friends, my animals and I love the fact that I have a very full life, after all life is for living, however trying to gain a balance is something I actively try to work on everyday. For me SELF was born from an idea and a passion for trying to encourage and help people (and myself) to celebrate and appreciate lifes simple pleasures, whether it be wearing something simple to life your mood, lighting a candle, drinking a fabulous cup of coffee or snuggling up on the sofa with a cosy blanket, a good book and a sweet treat. 

No matter how busy I am, I do try and savour these moments and I’ve come to realise, that personally for me, the small things can actually make a huge difference to my own wellbeing and when I actively set aside time to do these things for myself I feel much better for it and I am a better person for doing it.

Below are just some of the simple ways I personally try to help myself and protect my own wellbeing, whilst also living a very full and busy life:

1. Spend time with those who lift you up not drag you down. As selfish as it sounds my time has never been so precious as I have very little free time, so I actively try and spend it with those who make me feel uplifted & positive.
2. Try to plan in self care time for yourself. It may sound silly but I find this really helps. I run my life by lists, plans, rotas and a diary, so I now actively schedule ‘me-time’ in to my plans, if I don’t plan it, it just doesn’t happen!
3. Keep active. I am naturally a very 'on the go person', I rarely stop and sit down, however there is a difference between being active because you're busy and choosing to be 'mindfully active' because its good for your overall wellbeing. I try to get out in the fresh air and walk my dogs or run, as I find it really helps me to clear my head as well as physically helping me too.
4. Enjoy the small things. One of my favouite things to do when I get home is light my candles or wax melts. It brings me a lot of comfort and instantly helps me to relax, plus I do love my house to smell nice! The small things can make a big difference.
5. Remind yourself that you’re only human. This is probably the one thing I struggle with the most, but one of the most important things that I actively try and remind myself of. We can only do what we can physically do and that our best is actually good enough. 

I hope that if you’re reading this it helps a little? My lovely ladies and I pride ourselves on the fact that our shops are 'more than a shop’. Our shop doors, direct messages and email are always open, should you ever wish to stop by and chat or send a message/email and we will take the time to respond. Self Care truly is a form of healthcare when it comes to taking care of your mental well-being and we are on a mission to help you, to remind yourself to do just that.